Because of You
by Lystee
Summary: And then Naruto thought of something, something that made his insides tighten. How could he feel heartbroken when Sasuke already broke it before? Can his heart break when it wasn’t even whole to start with?


**Disclaimer: **I don't own Naruto, or anything for that matter. Sorry to let you down...

**Author's Notes: **I haven't written in a while, I know. But, since I heard this song (the Reba & Kelly version), I haven't been able to get this idea out of my head. I know it's very dark, very angst-filled, and quite depressing. Most of the stories I write are. If some of the facts and details are off, pretend that they are supposed to be that way. And, if the grammar is off, let me know. I have no beta. Hope you enjoy!

"**Because of You"**

Sasu/Naru Songfic

_I will not make the same mistakes that you did  
__I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery_

"You will become more powerful than you ever could have imagined. I will help you, Sasuke. I will help you defeat your demons. All I need is one small sacrifice in your part."

Sasuke let a shaky hand run absentmindedly through his hair as the memory flooded his senses. All at once he was standing in front of a sickly looking man, who resembled a snake a little too effectively. The man was breathing on him, and his breath was hot and sticky on Sasuke's skin. The man, whom was known to the world as Orochimaru, had a sickening smile on his face when he said _sacrifice_, as if sacrifices of this degree were made daily. He wanted Sasuke's body, and he knew that. But still, wouldn't it be worth the sacrifice if he was able to defeat his demon, his brother? And, yet, there was still the other half of that sacrifice.

_Sacrifice._ It wasn't a sacrifice. It was murder. If he were to accept these terms, could he deal with them? Could he kill the one person who had seen the real Sasuke? Could he actually kill the one person he possibly could have loved? Could he murder his Naruto? An image of Naruto, standing in the sunlight and holding up a bowl of ramen, filled his mind. The smell of his skin, the loudness of his voice, the feel of his hands, it was all too much for Sasuke. Could he drop to the level of his brother? There were too many questions filling his mind to think clearly. His heart was aching at the thought of his decision. When it came right down to it he had a choice: Itachi or Naruto. Murder Itachi or be with Naruto. There was no other way. And Sasuke hated it.

_I will not break the way you did, you fell so hard  
__I learned the hard way to never let it get that far_

'I should be training', Naruto thought to himself as he laid on the ground. His body was aching from the rigorous training; it was all taking a toll on his body. But he was getting stronger. A lot stronger. And for that, he was extremely proud of himself. He just hoped he was strong enough. 'Stupid teme!' Naruto growled inside of his head. He felt that he'd always kept his emotions pretty controlled, unless something really angered him or rubbed him the wrong way. But when the situation involved Sasuke, his emotions tended to get a little too wound up. He just had to leave, didn't he? He just had to go off on some suicide mission to hell, just to prove something. To prove something to the bastard who didn't deserve Sasuke's attention. Sasuke was too good for revenge.

But there he went again. Off on some thought-based tangent on how Sasuke shouldn't be there and how he has to go save him. He should have known Sasuke was breaking, slowly, from the inside out. He should have seen it, should have stopped it before it got this far. But he'd let Sasuke break, and Naruto decided then and there to be stronger than him. Not to break, even when the Earth was slipping away. Sasuke was falling into a deep, dark place that Naruto wasn't sure he could follow, but would try nonetheless. He had to save him, his best friend. He had to be strong, because if he let it get as far as Sasuke did, then what kind of hero would he be? Naruto stood up, looking a tree dead on and, forming a Rasengan, attempted to bust clear through it yet again.

_I lose my way and it's not too long before you point it out  
__I cannot cry because I know that's weakness in your eyes_

_An Uchiha is not weak. _Sasuke repeated that in his head a lot. He now lived and trained in what could only be described as a hell hole. A dark, underground shelter that was dimly lit, damp, and cold. And, sadly, Sasuke could almost feel at home here. It wasn't unlike the Uchiha mansion he had in Konaha. Looking around the dark, damp room that was supposed to be his bedroom, he suddenly felt a wave of sadness hit him, and hit him hard. He felt the tell-tale tingling sensation hit his eyes as the tears soon began to well up.

_An Uchiha does not cry._ Oh, but this Uchiha was about to, and this Uchiha refused to. He shook his head violently from side to side, willing the tears to leave his eyes. He was not weak, and he did not cry. He had not cried since he was eight, witnessing the pure carnage that had been placed in front of him. But not since then, and not ever again.

_I'm forced to fake a smile, a laugh, every day of my life  
__My heart can't break when it wasn't even whole to start with_

Jiraiya had taken, recently, to watching Naruto when he thought Naruto didn't notice. But Naruto noticed. He wasn't as dense as Konaha always assumed he was. So, during these training sessions, or even during the down time in between them, Naruto always kept a smile plastered to his face, or at least a look of contentment. Never a frown or a pout, unless the situation called for it of course. And never a look of sadness. Because this look, he'd learned fast, drove everyone around him to question his emotions and thoughts. And, although Naruto enjoyed attention, he despised the way everyone around him seemed to worry over him. He was stronger now, and he didn't need people to worry about him. He was worried enough for all of them. And he would protect them, no matter what.

But, even with all of the careful words and facial expressions, no one can hide or control their dreams. And that's what got Naruto into most of his trouble. He had horrible dreams; dreams of finally finding Sasuke, only to find that Orochimaru was using him as a puppet, or him finding Sasuke dead. They drove Naruto to screaming in his sleep and waking up in a cold sweat. And then there were the dreams Sasuke returning to Konaha. But those dreams made Naruto wake up in sweat for different reasons. Both types of dreams got Naruto laced with questions, all of which he played off and didn't answer. Because no matter how horrible the dreams could get, he would always be heartbroken to wake up and find that Sasuke wasn't there. He wasn't dead, or found, and he sure as hell didn't magically come home. And then Naruto thought of something, something that made his insides tighten. How could he feel heartbroken when Sasuke already broke it before? Can his heart break when it wasn't even whole to start with?

_I watched you die, I heard you cry every night in your sleep_

He sat straight up in bed, his body covered in a cold sweat. There it was again, his whole family laid out before him. All of them murdered in cold-blood. His hands were shaking as he pushed the strands of hair, which were plastered to his forehead, from his face. Instinctively, he turned his head to the side. He'd expected to see Naruto, on his knees beside him, wide-eyed and mouth agape, ready to ask Sasuke if he was okay. It was a routine they had become accustomed to during their missions. Sasuke would have a nightmare, in turn waking up Naruto, who would ask if Sasuke was okay, sit with him for a while, and they'd both go back to sleep. And, routinely, neither would mention it in the morning. Sasuke tried to shake the picture of Naruto from his head, only to marvel at how adorable Naruto had look with his hair messy the way it always was when he first woke up. But this time his mind made Naruto cock his head to the side and say something so horrible it made Sasuke shiver. _You're dying. Pretty soon you won't be my Sasuke anymore._ Sasuke got up and walked toward the bathroom. He might as well train since he knew sleep wouldn't come back now.

_I was so young, you should have known better than to lean on me_

The chidori current. A trick that Orochimaru was sure even the great Kakashi didn't know. But Sasuke was slowly getting the hang of it. He just had to fully focus his chakra into one emotion and allow the emotion to escape from him. That one emotion: hate. Hate was the one thing Itachi always said wasn't in his heart. Or at least, didn't fill it enough. But he was pretty sure he had it now. After all, he could do the new chidori and it took more hate than it would to murder his brother. Right?

Why had Itachi left him alive? Was it guilt? Or something else? Or maybe, just maybe, did he want Sasuke to be like him? Evil and cold-hearted. He left the entire family legacy lay in Sasuke's young hands. It was his job to rebuild his clan. Why would he do that to him? A young boy of only eight. Sure, he wasn't eight any more. He was fifteen. But still, too young to be forced into a life and a destiny he didn't ask for. So much like Naruto. Given a destiny at such a young age and being forced to deal with it on his own. Itachi shouldn't have allowed his responsibility to lean on his younger brother's shoulders.

_You never thought of anyone else, you just saw your pain_

'Stupid teme!' Naruto practically growled into his hands. They were balled into fists in front of his face, broken open and bleeding. The pain was starting to become too much as he found it harder to get back up and fight each time he fell. But he had to fight. He had to save the 'stupid teme' even if said teme didn't want saving, even if he screamed at Naruto to leave him to fight this alone. Alone; a five letter word that described Naruto's current emotion to a glove-like fit. He didn't want to be alone. He wanted Sasuke to be there with him, or him be there with Sasuke. Whichever came first. And he'd fight for it, just like his life depended on it; which it did, whether the stupid teme realized it or not. He always thought he had to do everything alone. He didn't need help from anyone. What about the people that needed help from Sasuke? What about them? Naruto stood up, his whole body shaking with pent-up emotions. He never saw anyone else, not when it came to him fighting Itachi. It would always only be Sasuke. Sasuke and his pain.

_And now I cry in the middle of the night for the same damn thing_

It was nighttime where both Naruto and Sasuke were. Not realizing it, they both looked up at a beautiful star-lit sky at the same time. Both wondering what each other were thinking about at that moment, and yet, still not realizing they were each other's answer.

Both men – well, boys really – dropped their heads, in a mirror image of each other, and allowed single tears to roll. Both landing on soft grass that was stained with blood from training. The Uchiha may not have wanted to cry, but once it started, it wouldn't stop. The Uzumaki may not have intended on crying, but once it started, it wouldn't stop. And both boys stood there, one arm held out to a tree for support, as they thought of each other, what they had lost, and let their emotions go.

_Because of you  
__I never stray too far from the sidewalk  
__Because of you  
__I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt_

It was time. Both of them knew it. They were fifteen, stronger, and in the same place at the same time.

But Naruto still didn't want to. If the only way to stop Sasuke was to kill Sasuke, then he would. But that didn't mean he'd want to. And because of his need to keep his Sasuke alive, he played it safe. He dodged attacks and only intended to would when he attacked back. But he knew it wouldn't be enough. If he kept this up, the only one walking away would be Sasuke. Naruto would be in a body bag. So, when he watched Sasuke fire up a chidori like he'd never seen before, he immediately fired up the only thing that could stop it, a rasengan. He had to play this safe; he had to stay alive to bring Sasuke back. But he didn't want to.

_Because of you  
__I try my hardest just to forget everything  
__Because of you  
__I don't know how to let anyone else in  
__Because of you  
__I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty_

The chidori connected with its intended target. And Naruto was too safe. His rasengan barely connected with anything. Sasuke could feel the power of the Mengekyo sharingan race through his body, his eyes – now a pinwheel of red and black – focused on the eyes of his best friend as they were slowly being drained of life. That is when Sasuke snapped. The seal, currently present on Sasuke's left shoulder, disintegrated into the air, leaving nothing but pale skin behind. He was stronger than Orochimaru, yet he felt weakened and vulnerable. The one thing he'd been preparing himself for, for three long years, was over. Naruto was dying, with Sasuke's arm through his chest.

Amongst all the confusion, Sasuke had to marvel at the irony. Now that he'd had his precious gift, he'd give it all back just to have Naruto. And only moments before, he would have traded Naruto to have his precious gift. Again he thought of his brother, of what he now had to do. And it killed a part of him inside. The man he thought he needed to destroy had forced him to destroy everything else around him. Including the one person – hell, the only person – Sasuke had ever let in. Even if he hadn't let him in that far, he still got closer than anyone else. And that had said something about Naruto. But now, he just wanted to run. Run away from the guilt that was sweeping through him and he felt Naruto's grip on his shoulder get weaker and weaker. His life meant nothing now; all the training and preparation meant nothing. Yet, somehow, Naruto could still make him feel a little better, just by attempting to smile.

_Because of you  
__I am afraid_

Naruto could feel everything slipping away, and as he watched his life flash before his eyes – an act he was sure Sasuke could see with that weird thing his eyes were doing – he realized he left a lot of things unfinished. He never told Sakura how he felt about her, or how his feelings had changed. He never told Kakashi-sensei how absolutely awesome he was. He never told Grandma Tsunade that he really saw her as family, which is why he irritated her so much. And he never saw himself made Hokage of the Hidden Leaf Village. But, most importantly, he never got a chance to tell Sasuke how he felt about him. How they were always more than best friends or rivals. How those emotions ran a deep path through his heart. Or how, at the thought of having to kill Sasuke, he could feel himself becoming nauseous. But, he thought that now maybe Sasuke knew, because the look in Sasuke's eyes changed. It was fear. Sasuke actually felt fear. His hand squeezed tighter on Sasuke's shoulder as his head fell forward a little bit. This act alone turned Sasuke's fear into horrification, but Naruto just attempted a smile and whispered, 'I can't stay with you, but I'll still be here.' Naruto's hand slipped from Sasuke's shoulder to land, gently, over Sasuke's heart. This, seemingly enough, said everything, as Naruto let himself be carried off into a bright light.

And with this, Sasuke cried. He cried harder than he ever had before.

"I am afraid, Naruto. And now, instead of Itachi, it's because of you."

* * *

Like I said before, dark and angst-ridden. But we all know that Sasu/Naru aren't going to go walk through a field of daisies. No matter how much us fangirls/fanboys beg, lol.

And I promise to try and write something, um, happy soon. I'm trying, I promise.


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